I sit here in my usual place with my writing and read. People converse with me and I do my best to offer up conversational fodder so that I can learn this person or that one better. There is music playing and the pitter patter of people, the yelling of drinks people have ordered, and the muffled muttering you hear through the window as people smoke and talk jovially. These people's lives will continue regardless of whether you are here or not.
That is one of the scariest things about life. People will continue as if you never existed even if you were a meaningful part of their life. Why, though? A question I have asked myself many times.
I write to no one through this as no one looks at this. I am alone here and will remain that way until I leave; even then I will be alone. I want that but is it what is best?
It is only a little less than a month before I leave and am gone from peoples' lives for a time. How will I handle it? Some of those people have faith in me, but I have little faith in myself at this point.
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